I’m feeling funny….
Not really funny… different maybe. Different from the ‘me’ that I know.
I feel like crying. Ands it’s the second time in 2 days. “Why…?” You may ask… I’ll tell you when I know. Right now, everything I am doing and thinking about is nice, yet I feel like crying. Now there is a pain I’m sure I don’t know off… It can’t be “THE CRY OF JOY”. Cause its painful. But I can’t think of anything that I’m sad about. I’m directing a play; I just finished Auditioning for it. So it can’t be out of a lack of activity. I’ve been meeting my friends quite often now. So, it’s not because I’m missing them. I’m happy and content in every which way, but I feel like crying. A painful crying. Last evening after meeting my friends and before I met them again a little while later…. I felt like crying. I wanted to be alone. Really alone. Blasted city has no place where I can be alone for a while…
And now that troubles me… Since when did I start to want to be alone…. I hate it. Like I said, I’m different from the ‘me’ that I know. I’ve been switching off very often nowadays. Not that I normally don’t, but this time it’s mostly conscious. I’ve always had this habit of very unconsciously switching off. And suddenly I resort to it, at every opportune moment. It’s like being addicted to switching off. This is not me.
I want to change
I have to change
Because…
I have already changed.
And I feel like crying.
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